The Return of My First Fuck Bunny

Dear Diary,

Japan trip was alright. Now, I’m back to Singapore for a short while. Such an abrupt return trip.. I hope everything gets fixed soon so that I don’t have to be tied down in this island where my soul no longer feels alive. Sex seems to be the only interesting thing I can do here.

Interestingly, my first fuck bunny sensed my presence remotely. During my second week after the end of my Red Moon, he went online & saw my new post. He is one of my regular LOVERS™. ‘Fuck Bunnies’ was an offering late last year where I seeked out polite, young, hot & fit bunnies for lesser CARROTS™. A form of reward for their grooming efforts and good personality which made perfect sense, given that their presence is more enjoyable than stressful. Given that KINDER BUENO™ is like the egg shaped chocolate with a surprise toy inside, you won’t know who you’re getting. But I ended it shortly after— it’s too much of a hassle and invited problems of its own.

Anyways my time with Mr. First Fuck Bunny (FFB), a Chinese Singaporean in his 30’s, remains insightful. I was his warmth comfort and pillow of confession while he became a well of insight I didn’t expect, one that challenges my perspective on sex & marriages. The problems in his marriage sex life helped me to understand what could possibly happen after Happily Ever After. While I take my time to find my prince charming, I secretly love to learn from other’s success and erm… lessons. :)

Deep inside, I still dream of having a marriage that blooms like a fairytale magic, growing ever more enchanted with time. No giving up, even if divorce has become the societal norm and ‘Hall Pass’ are casually placed on the dinner table when sexual desire temporary fades. If I have to keep learning, growing and wait for the right Gentlemen, it will certainly be worth it.

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A FERAL PASSION

Meeting Mr. FFB has never been short of wild energy.

Upon the first 5 minutes of meeting, his eyes would lit up the entire room. He can’t wait to grab my ass, squeeze my titts and start stripping me. I should have run around the house for him to catch me like bunnies fleeing among the flower fields. He is always so reluctant to a take a shower first (Part of the ritual). He wanted to fuck me right there and then upon entering my burrow. We ravished each other, fast and furious.

I remember when I first met him in December 2024, we couldn’t stop touching each other and humping non stop. Even as I accompany him in taking a shower together after our steamy session, we end up fucking again in the bathroom like wet bunnies mating relentlessly under the pouring rain. I had to even whack his butt out the door with a hand towel! (Had to meet another lover soon).

CONFESSIONS: THE SCHEDULED SEX

Lying on the bed, we were exhausted.

”So, how’s your marriage sex life, getting better?”, I asked curiously.
”Nah, worst. It has now become once every few months. Or when you’re around.”, he replied. I immediately hugged him tight to console him. No more words needed. He held onto my hands with a helpless expression while staring into the ceiling.

His sex life after being married for a few years, plumped down in frequency and it became a monthly scheduled sex. He suspect it’s her spin class. He brought it up with her. But his wife reply was “There are other ways to love each other than sex.”. He worries that the more he props, his 1 will become a 0. So he beared with it silently and went out seeking intimacy.

‘‘Now we’re having sex only for childbirth purposes.” He confessed sadly.
“Since things are this bad, I wonder if we really did have a child, wouldn’t it get worse?”.

I asked how his sex life was during the dating phase. He said they had frequent sex even secretly in their University classroom! How naughty and hot… 😜

It’s not my first time hearing something similar like this. I guess married women forgot that Men needs to feel loved and desired too. Perhaps for him, it’s through the medium of Orgasm while for her it’s Acts of love such as romances and undivided attention.

I wish I could give him a much deeper insight and solution but I was a still living a Bachelor’s life. It puzzled me— He is young, fit, clean, and clearly not lacking in performance. He had a good heart too. Yet somehow, their sex life became a routine without a passionate rhythm.

This Sex Bunny could only make sure he enjoyed his time with her while he fully unleashed his wild side and heads back home feeling loved and fulfilled.

“Now we’re having sex only for childbirth purposes.”

— Mr. First Fuck Bunny

HIS FIRST EXPLORATION: RED LIGHT DISTRICT

“I’m glad I met you, Vicky.”, he said with appreciation. His story of how he first went out to search for intimacy was funny yet surprisingly painful.

Many moons ago, he was just like any rookie checking out Geylang streets for the first time but had a hard time knowing where exactly to find the ladies. Because Singapore’s prostitution law was in the ‘Grey Area’, most foreign sex workers hid themselves. So you gotta know which apartment to head to (I think).

“I remember seeing someone I know on the street, it was so embarrassing even though we were both searching for the same thing. I couldn’t even ask him for directions, it was too awkward.”.

As a young girl, I personally never had the reason to go to the Red Light District, it sounded more like a folklore. By the time I grew of age, the infamous Red Light District was cleared up by the police force. I didn’t know a Singaporean men could feel this lost in his own land. Like as if there wasn’t even a brotherhood of mutual acknowledgement, social support and maybe an exchange of naughty grins like you would see in Bangkok’s Soi Cowboy street.

HIS SECOND EXPLORATION: ONLINE ESCORTS

After the awkward and confusing search experience by foot, he went online and met someone who is today known as the ‘ Oldest Singaporean Escort ’ . His bunny ears drooped and trembled in fear as he recalled how she treated him. I was shocked.

She arrived late to their meeting and carried an angry attitude. After he undressed, she was screaming at him with disgust and insulted him: “Your dick so dirty, you expect me to suck this meh? You see, see this!!”. He told me she even grabbed his balls forcefully and demanded extra payment for her grievances even though nothing was done in the session. He was traumatised and didn’t look for anymore companion the next few years till he met me in a Sex Forum.

Funny enough, I’ve met some Lovers who shared similar stories about this lady when they were searching for local escort— A highly disturbed, volatile and angry Chinese Singaporean Auntie in her 40’s (As of 2025).

I thought I am the only gender haunted with bad experiences on this Singapore’s Dark Web, an infamous Sex Forum — Apparently not. Dark spaces attract dark minds. And sometimes, some of us gets pulled inside, entangled with souls we were never meant to meet.

A RECALL OF HIS FATHER

“I remembered when I was young my Dad went out to look for prostitutes. I found out… But never told my Mom. I lost respect for him ever since.” He recalled. He didn’t have to explain further. I understood. After growing up and gotten married, he now finds himself in a strangely similar situation. Some wounds travel through time, others are quietly inherited.

So.. Are we as a society, viewing intimacy all wrong?

Are there really so many married women who no longer enjoy sex and treats desire like an optional chore instead of a sacred bond— After all they went through to finally find their soulmate? (I haven’t even found mine.)

We can name our anatomy but don’t explore enough about our own pleasure.
We marry for love, but somewhere along the way… stop making love.
We regulate & suppress the sex industry, but not address the loneliness and feelings of being undesired behind the closed bedroom door.

In the silence of such contradictions, boys grow into men… feeling suppressed and probably ashamed to express their desires even with the one he loves. How can this be happening?

Maybe the problem isn’t that he looked for pleasure elsewhere.
Maybe it’s the fact that we pretend we don’t need it and thinks it’s a problem that will disappear by itself through time.. At the hidden cost of losing closeness.
Maybe some married women lack awareness..

But what if… some wives aren’t cold or cruel?
What if they simply never been seduced in the way their soul secretly longs for?